Tag Archives: rating

We went to see Spielberg’s War of the Worlds on Friday night, preceded by the traditional Zebra pub grub.

Tom Cruise is an unconvincing immature divorced parent, just as he is an unconvincing fiancé of Katie Holmes. Cruise’s role should have gone to Tim Robbins, though the latter does have a nice line in crazed loons in cellars. Cruise just looks like he’s pretending not to be a Hollywood star; Robbins can actually act.

Dakota Fanning is pretty good – it’s not a Spielberg SF film without a competent child actor. Sadly, it’s not a Spielberg SF film without a couple of tons of sugar either, generously applied.

Happily this ain’t Independence Day, and Cruise doesn’t become a superhero who saves the planet. For that, we give thanks.

Avaragado’s rating: two bottles of red wine.

Well, that was better.

Of course, being Lucas, being Star Wars, I don’t think there was a single line of less-than-clunky dialogue, or a single scene without green-screen. Visually it is of course spectacular. Verbally, well, “wild bantha chase”?

The scene with the, er, “younglings” could have been much, much more effective with two simple changes: a better child actor, and the raising of a second light sabre. There wouldn’t have been a dry eye.

There was an almost throwaway line near the end from our little green friend that raised more questions than it answered. The transition to episode four is pretty good, though not without its oddities. A few other plot holes gaped but never mind: Jar Jar only gets a couple of words in the entire film.

As we were leaving the cinema I heard someone say that there’s room for another episode between three and four, and that’s true, but I suspect the TV series will serve that purpose. I still think Lucas might decide to remake four, five and six, since the effects chasm between three and four will nag away at him. That’s just my fanboy wishful thinking though.

So the sequence is complete. It feels a bit weird actually.

Avaragado’s rating: one large onion.

I deliberately remained as unspoiled as possible for the Hitchhikers film. I saw a few pics in magazines and read a couple of interviews, but avoided detailed discussion. I didn’t watch the trailers. It was impossible to remain entirely unspoiled: I knew about some of the homages to the TV series. I’d also heard about, but not read, the mixed reviews.

The dolphin, er, sequence at the beginning. Well. That was a surprise. It left me thinking, what have they done?, and had visions of a Python film (not that that’s bad, just unexpected and out of place in this instance). After that, the first ten minutes or so of dialogue was almost word for word from the TV show, as far as I remember it. Strange: two scenes playing in your head, one from the eyes, one from the memory. I tried to turn down the memory volume, to little effect. Is it me, or did they film the pub scene in the original pub?

For much of the film familiar scenes suddenly lurched into unfamiliar territory. I wonder how many of the new bits were by Douglas Adams? I’ll have to go back and read what I’ve been avoiding, I guess. I suppose I can live with the obligatory love interest. There was, at least, some point to the story rather than just a 90-minute ramble.

Martin Freeman was perfect casting, and Stephen Fry not far off. The Americans were tolerable. I preferred the original Marvin, Stephen Moore; Alan Rickman was a good choice but there was something missing – not depressed enough I think. Bill Nighy as Slartibartfast stole every scene he was in. The League of Gentlemen did most of the Vogon voices, pretty well but a bit too recognisably Tubbs in places. Bill Bailey was a good choice for the whale.

I think Douglas Adams would have liked it. But I suspect that, were he here to see it, he’d still be writing it, if you see what I mean.

The BBC are showing the original TV series, starting next Tuesday night. I don’t remember the last time they repeated it: must be ten years ago at least. I might watch them again. Resistance is, after all, useless.

Avaragado’s rating: one green salad

Cat Deeley? Vernon Kay? Eamonn Holmes? Terry Wogan?

I suspect Robots has done a Shrek 2 by using regional celebs (I only actually recognised Wogan – the others we saw in the credits). I’m not a fan of this idea, really. I blame Andi Peters for somehow snagging a credited role in Toy Story.

The film was OK, I guess. Not in the same league as yer Shreks or yer Incredibles. Not that many titters in the audience. Not even from Chris, who’d had a few drinks at the pub beforehand and got through at least half a bottle of red at Pizza Hut.

Fantastic animation, though.

Avaragado’s rating: four nuts